[ShrimpBurrito]

Sauropod -

A few comments -- first, your tongue weight is right on the money, and it in fact will go up even more once you are fully packed for camping. The higher tongue weight is a result of the axle being a bit further back than on my campers, which reduces the chance of sway.

Second, air bags, springs, and a heavier WDH will do nothing to improve your situation. Absolutely nothing. The TM, the Flex, and the contents of both weigh a certain amount. Eliminating weight with the addition of any of those things would violate the laws of physics, as you implied, and in fact, only the WDH can transfer the weight anywhere. But transferring weight off the hitch means it goes to the TM axle, which is already near it's max, and to the front axle of your Flex, which you don't have the capacity for.

Perhaps if you were driving through Kansas 100% of the time, there might be a place for a discussion about doing something to make your setup borderline safe. Maybe. But you are towing in the Rockies, which, outside of Alaska, is probably the most demanding towing environment in the U.S. My TV, a Toyota Sequoia, is a V8 with a tow capacity of ~5,500 lbs, and at times while towing in the Sierras, parts of which are like the Rockies, there is no way I'd want to tow the TM there with anything less than what I have. And that's only with 2 adults and a dog, plug water, food, beer, firewood, camp chairs, propane, etc. I was astonished at how quickly it all added up.

I think you already know the answer to your question. Based on what appears to be some informed research and forethought, you are uncomfortable with your current setup. I think that is a very reasonable assessment. Furthermore, you think you need to do something -- either buy a smaller camper or a more capable TV. I also think that is a very reasonable assessment. When we bought our TM, I found myself in the exact same position as you (but with a slightly more capable TV), and decided to get a larger TV. Yes, it was more expensive, but driving to/from your campsite while white-knuckled is not how want to spend what is supposed to be a relaxing weekend.

Take note that I have seen many canvas-style pop-up campers that weight just as much as a TM, and some even MORE. And even with the really smaller ones, it will be tight. We towed a 1,500-lb (dry weight, probably 2,500 wet) pop-up fully loaded with 4 adults in a Jeep Cherokee, and while I felt safe, I felt we had reached the limit.

The Flex sounds like a great camping vehicle -- if you were tent camping. Just my 2 cents....

Dave