Good questions.
The 2002 Explorer is a completely different vehicle from the 2001 and earlier models. When I traded my 2002 (with the V-8) earlier this year, it had 160K miles and still had plenty of life left in it. So don't base any thinking on the performancer or ratings of earlier models.
My suggestions would be the following.
1. Read the Ford towing guide for your vehicle. It is on-line at the Ford site, and has a lot of good info. Be sure you are familiar with the ratings of your particular vehicle, as you have it equipped.
2. If you didn't get the factory tow package when you bought the vehicle, then get a mechanic to add an auxiliary transmission cooler - the biggest one you can find. You will definitely need it for towing on steep grades at high altitude.
3. I suggest that you get the smaller (lower weight) TM, and that you make a point of packing light. Based on my own experience, I'm a bit concerned about the V-6 as a tow vehicle at high altitudes and steep grades.
4. I strongly suggest that you get an aftermarket multi-gauge (plugs into the OBD-II port on your vehicle) so that you can monitor things like transmission temperature. They are relatively cheap ($100-200) and can save you from a world of hurt. I use an Aeroforce Interceptor (
http://www.aeroforcetech.com/). Other members here use a Scan Gauge (
http://www.scangauge.com/). Both are good, and I am sure there are others.
5. On steep upgrades at high altitudes, like Wolf Creek Pass or the approach to the Eisenhower Tunnel, expect to slow down and stay in the right lane. No need to try to blast your way up.
6. I never had any trouble stopping. Under normal conditions, the TM pretty much stops itself, of course. However, on long downgrades, you will need to use engine braking, which heats up the transmission - another reason for the temp gauge. Incidentally, I had one incident in which I lost one of the TM brakes one a very steep, very long, very twisty downgrade - on the Coronado Trail in eastern Arizona. The Explorer easily kept the TM in line and under control through out the entire 10 or so miles of these conditions.
With some care and forethought, I think you'll be OK.
Bill