Mike, just to be sure you are aware of the people who have replaced the recirculating toilet with either a Thetford Curve, or (more work) the Thetford Cassette.
My TMs have come with the cassette, and I love it. I can see your wife's concern, which is why I think the cassette or Curve are good alternatives.
Installing a cassette is a pain. It has been done, but more have installed the Curve. Both use fresh water to flush, so there is no recirculating of liquids. Also, you don't have to go to a dump station to empty. I take my cassette to a toilet or outhouse, and empty there. Don't have to move the trailer to empty. We can go 3-4 days between empty activity.
I think a Curve is a much better solution than a black tank. As some have mentioned in other threads, black tanks need vents, and there is no good way to vent with a TM.
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