I would measure the width of your opening, then call the factory. Not sure how close you are to Custom RV, but you may be able to work through them, also.
Don't know why your screws are pulling out, as we use our dinette table for sleeping on occasion, and my DW sets up the table every time we set up. No loose screws, yet, in our third season of camping in our TM.
I cut-down my first TM table leaf, as we wanted a little more room to get into the dinette in our 2417 Sport. The middle is a foam-type material. If you have your carpenter friend cut-down the table, any routing he does on the edge will expose the foam material. Then you will have to color it, and seal it somehow.
I think giving the factory another try will be your best bet.
Good luck!
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